I guess I better get busy learning everything about the state of Iowa
I have to start this week’s column with a confession.
I confess I know little to nothing about Iowa.
I know, you are wondering how someone could have lived the past 17-plus years just nine miles away from Iowa and then say he knows little to nothing about that state.
But it is true.
People I know in Blue Earth talk about Iowa all the time. People like Jim Nauman, Lill Robinson, Cory Milbrandt and way too many others to name. They talk about wonderful Iowa small towns and the awesome things in these towns and they assume I know them or have been to them.
But actually, I have no idea what they are talking about.
Oh, I have been to Spencer, Iowa, for their fair and to see their model railroad, and we once spent a weekend at Lake Okoboji and Arnolds Park when my kids were young.
But most of the time, Iowa to me has just been a place to drive through on my way to other states, like Florida, Massachusetts, Colorado, Texas or Arizona. I have spent a lot of time in those states and many others over the years. But Iowa? Nope.
So you are probably wondering why this sudden fascination with Iowa? And why the desire to learn a whole lot more about the Hawkeye State?
Well, I guess it is high time I learn about the Great State of Iowa, since apparently, I am going to become an Iowan.
Now, before you start spreading the news that the editor of the Faribault County Register is moving to Iowa, I have to make something perfectly clear.
I am not moving to Iowa. Iowa is moving to me.
Perhaps you, too, have also seen the news that a state senator in Iowa wants his state to purchase nine counties in Minnesota from the state of Minnesota. No, no, seriously. It sounds like an April Fools story and it would have been a dandy one if this was April. However, he is serious and is going to promote the idea in the Iowa state senate, I guess. The news stations are all reporting this.
What nine counties you ask? Well, it is the bottom tier of nine counties of Minnesota. The nine counties that abut Iowa. Faribault County is the center of those nine, with four counties to the west to South Dakota and four to the east to Wisconsin.
The senator makes his case by saying these counties are an area that once was part of Iowa when it was a territory. And that they (I mean us) have lots more in common with Iowa than we do with Minnesota. I guess because we are basically farm land with few lakes.
He lists other advantages for both Iowa and Minnesota, such as Minnesota making big money off the sale. Although no dollar amount was mentioned, as far as I know.
He also pointed out that this kind of land swap/purchase between states has been done in the past, but I think maybe that was in the long ago past, as I have not heard of any recent deals like this.
Will this happen? I doubt it. Can it happen? Not sure. But if the U.S. can buy Greenland, then maybe Iowa can buy us.
Now, I have not always been a Minnesotan, as many of you know. I was born and raised in California, so I was a Californian for 14 years. I spent my high school years in Colorado so I was a Coloradan. My wife, Pam, and I spent the first four years of our married life in North Dakota, so I went from being a Minnesotan for four years to being a North Dakotan for four years, then back again to being a Minnesotan for the next 50 years or so.
But never in my wildest dreams did I ever think I was going to become an Iowan.
I have tried to think about how life would be as an Iowan. What would the advantages be? Maybe my taxes would go down. Maybe there would be more state money for our schools. Maybe things like my insurance and cost of getting a drivers’ license would be less.
Truthfully, I am not sure becoming an Iowan would be a major change in my life. Life would probably go on in Faribault County pretty much the same as it does now.
There could be one huge advantage to becoming an Iowan, however.
If I were no longer a Minnesotan, that means I could legitimately quit being a die hard Minnesota Vikings fan and thus no longer get my hopes and dreams for the team smashed to smithereens all the time and no longer suffer great heartbreak, agony and despair.
OK, enough about those Vikings.